Thursday, July 2, 2009

Dumb Blonde Whore

Hayden Panettierre is the dumbest girl in Hollywood today. Sure she is good looking, not a horrible actress, and gets a good deal of endorsements. But she is officially a fool for this stupid shit. She got a tattoo of Italian words that she and her biffles probably thought were totally the hottest euro words ever. They probably don't even know what it means. And to add to their confusion when they pull out their "Italian for Dummies" book, she got a word spelled wrong. It is supposed to say "rimpianti", not "rimipianti". Stupid.

If you are going to get a tattoo on your body, you should probably get that shit spell checked.

Blondes. Gotta love them.
God Bless America!

Alert: Fat Nobodies

What the fuck? I'll just let the tags speak for themselves.

Parents: hide the children.

Courtney Love is Forced to Eat

"Pale is the New Tan" innovator Courtney Love has been ordered by her doctor to start eating more. Apparently, pills and vodka don't make for a well-balanced diet. Shame, it's been working so well on me, Lindsay, and Mischa :(.

How about we get a court order to put this sack of bones in a tanning booth? As long as we don't have to see her emaciated Ethiopian ribs, we don't give a shit what she eats, but if we have to see her skin, put some color into it, for Christ's sake! I can see the melanin seeping from her toes onto the carpet.

Jessica Simpson Eats A Microphone

She has really been putting it on these last few months, huh? Fat Simps is seen here at the AT&T Golf Tournament doing her best to wrap her mouth around this microphone while she sings the National Anthem. For a moment, when she hits the high note, I got a bit anxious that her mouth was open wide enough for the mic to slip right in discreetly. Her Oompa Loompa summer tan is looking overdone, as usual, and her no food seems to have passed her by.

She's got a hell of a voice though. It's too bad she's wasting it on country music.

Alert: Beware of Guidos

Helping spread stereotypes is always fun, and here is a closeted homo Guido who wants to do just that. What do you guys think? Philly Guido? Jersey Guido? Staten Island Guido? Rhode Island Guido?

The possibilities are endless.